To do or not to do….
I love a good to do list! Writing things down makes them real. Making them real means I have to do them. And the deep seated satisfaction of crossing something off of the do to list is amazing. Come on…I can’t be the only one who truly loves crossing things off the list???
My weekday lists are insanely long. There are household chores to accomplish. Family things to take care of. Church events to organize. Business things to handle. And of course, writing tasks to jump all over. I make lists daily. In my planner. On the family calendar. On post it notes.
Like any self-professed Supermom, I am proficient at getting things done. Until THAT moment hits. You know the one. You sit down for a minute, just to chill and regroup, and it hits. Fatigue. Suddenly, a nap is all you can think of. You blink too long and find yourself jerking awake, hoping no one noticed.
The couch is slowly sapping all of the energy from your body. You settle in, knowing it’s a bad idea to stay any longer. But, you can’t resist the embrace of the cushions. The pull of relaxation drags on your every cell. Your eyes are heavy as sleep beckons you like a long lost lover.
Next thing you know, an hour has passed and the to do list is a distant memory. Craaaaaap! Would you believe a Type A control freak like me used to get uber upset when I’d snooze an hour away and not cross things off the list? Crazy right?!
The anxiety I created for myself was insane if I didn’t cross all of the things off the list. It was never panic inducing. And being such a self-contained person, no one actually knew I was secretly freaking out about the things left on the list. I had to get it done. I just had to get it all done!!
A few years ago, I went to the chiropractor for a neck issue and she adjusted and massaged and taped me right onto my couch for a week. A whole week of not being allowed to do anything. I may or may not have freaked out on the drive home. My list! What about my lists!!!??!! I had no choice but to stay on the couch and it almost killed me.
In that week, I learned a few things. First, the world kept spinning even if things didn’t get crossed off the list. Second, my house won’t fall apart if I don’t do the things. Last, I suck at sitting still. I’m a work in progress.
In the years since my week hiatus, I’ve learned that it’s totally fine to fall asleep randomly on the couch. Clearly, even Supermom gets tired. I’ve also learned that what doesn’t get done today will still be on the list tomorrow. Does it still freak me out when I can’t cross them all off the list? Duh! Like I said, work in progress. Now, to combat my ridiculous sense of Type A completion, I simply make the lists smaller. See…. problem solved!!